September 17, 2006
EDGAR “MOUSE” HOHL’S HICKORY-DICKORY-DOCK #6
AMERICA’S GREAT WALL
America’s Great WallRobert Frost wrote, “Something there is that doesn’t love a wall.” Maybe so, but not Republicans. Some of them consider a wall the solution to illegal immigration.The leader of the “Wall Nuts” is U.S. Congressman Duncan Hunter (R-CA). Last November he proposed a 15-ft wall be constructed along the entire 2000 mile border with Mexico.
Congressman Hunter envisions two parallel, 15-ft. steel barriers running the length of the border with a 100-yard no-man’s land in between. The wall would be equipped with the most sophisticated technology and military hardware including high intensity lights and movement sensors. It’s to be patrolled by robotic drones, helicopters, and red-blooded Americans armed with all-terrain vehicles, computers, and night-vision.
If the Republicans and Red-Necks succeed, the promise of America’s most revered symbol of freedom, the Statue of Liberty:
“Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free…”
will be replaced with…
He says they fear an open society.
The Mexicans say it’s un-American. They’re offended. They say no wall is going to keep a resourceful, hardworking, Christian people from seeking The Promised Land.
The U.S. Army National Guard, Federal Marshals, Border Patrol, DEA, FBI, CIA, and Minutemen volunteers are determined to stop the alien invaders. Since 1998, more people have died along the border than perished in the 911 attack.
At present, more than 80 miles of walls and lethal fencing has already been built through towns and principal entry points. The citizens of Nogales, Arizona call it the “Iron Curtain.”
Iran’s President, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, is certain to visit The Wall where he’ll proclaim to the media of the world, “Allah es Mexicano“. Likewise, Vladamir Putin will make a speech before tens of thousands of Latino-Americans in San Diego in which he’ll conclude, “Mr. Bush, tear down this wall!”
“Something there is that doesn’t love a wall.”
It used to be Americans.
| Permalink | Comments (0)
September 13, 2006
EDGAR “MOUSE” HOHL’S HICKORY-DICKORY-DOCK #5
THROW ON-LINE SPORTS BETTING TO THE LIONS
Throw On-Line Sports Betting to the Lions
SportsBet.com, to tout its website, tantalized the public by putting $100,000 in $1 bills on a Las Vegas Strip billboard last week. They then posted odds and took wagers on the proposition that the money would be stolen. It was a bad bet.
The company showed how cheap it is. In Las Vegas, $100,000 is chump change. Benny Binion put a $1 million dollars on display in the Horseshoe when gasoline was 50-cents a gallon and a new Ford cost $600.
What’s more, making theft of the money a proposition bet is sleazy and cynical. The odds that desperation and greed would win out and the money would be stolen were 6-to-1. They should’ve been higher.
Although the money was to remain on the billboard until October, four risk-takers went for it soon after the money was put up. In Las Vegas, only the “pigeons” were surprised.
When the billboard security guard left at 3 AM for a break (?), thieves climbed the billboard and tried to steal the money. Railbirds watching the action from the street called police, but the four gamblers jumped into a car and sped away before they arrived.
The Police recovered $96,300. A spokesman said the company will not press charges because most of the money was recovered.
Some contend that the whole $100,000 billboard event was a stunt designed to generate millions of dollars worth of publicity. If it was supposed to attract attention, it certainly did. But stunt or not, it was stupid.
Along with the War on Drugs, the War in Afghanistan, the War in Iraq, and the War on Terrorism, the U.S. Government has most recently declared a War on Internet Gambling and its first target is sports betting.
Any sports book that doesn’t take care of money better than that shouldn’t be in the business. And, apparently SportsBet.com won’t be very long. While this billboard farce was unfolding, Peter Dicks, company chairman, was arrested at New York’s Kennedy International Airport following his arrival from England.
It seems the Chairman is wanted in Louisiana for Internet gambling, a felony. Now, company officials want to take their chips off the table and have asked that trading of its stock be suspended.
Sports have a long history as a source of crime and corruption, from the 1919 World Series fix to the current concerns over steroids and doping. The original 1961 Wire Act prohibiting betting over phone lines (Internet later included) was specifically aimed at sports betting.
Republicans and the uptight Christian Right are always looking for a fight. They have a Crusader Complex, a sense of mission. If a sacrifice is necessary to appease them, throw sports betting to the lions.
Internet Poker, on the other hand, does not deserve the same fate. Poker is pure free enterprise capitalism. It is each individual risking his/her investment through wit and wisdom, luck and pluck to realize a profit. If playing Poker online is illegal, it’s time to shut down the Stock Exchange.
| Permalink | Comments (1)
LAS VEGAS MAKES THE TOP TEN
Las Vegas Makes The Top Ten
A national study released its findings this past July and listed Las Vegas in the top ten amon metropolitan areas for what Intersections Inc. characterizes as iJacking, the emotionally devastating crime that drains your accounts, hurts your reputation and leaves you financially paralyzed when thieves assume your identity or use your Social Security number to commit fraud crimes.”
On behalf of Intersections, Inc., Bert Sperling’s Best Places conducted a study of the 50 largest metropolitan areas in the United States and determined the cities at the highest and lowest risk for iJacking. The survey used several factors which fall into categories such as: Technology Impact; Lifestyle Risks; Transaction Habits; At Risk Behavior. Below are the top ten, all of which are Western cities:
1. San Francisco
2. Seattle
3. Denver
4. San Jose
5. San Diego
6. Atlanta
7. Salt Lake City
8. Las Vegas
9. Sacramento
10. Phoenix
The study also shows a link where increasing use of methamphetamine mirrors an increase rate of identity theft.
I also wonder where Las Vegas ranks on the methamphetamine list, my guess is very high. Does this mean Jerry Airelo is right about our declining safety? But we know that our police officials are diligently addressing our safety by investigating the stunt on the strip where Sportsbook,com hung $100,000 in one dollar bills over the strip and “thieves” threw handfuls of dollar bills into the air after the security guard went on his 3:00 a.m. break.
The Police Protective Association, the union for the police, is also concerned for our safety after hiring surveillance to collect six weeks of videotape purportedly showing Clark County Commissioner Lynette Boggs McDonald lives in a home which is not in the district she represents. Did we note that Ms. McDonald did not support the recent pay increases demanded by the union?
-Zounding Off
| Permalink | Comments (0)
September 5, 2006
CLARK COUNTY RECORDER FRANCES DEANE ORDERED TO STEP DOWN FROM OFFICE
Four months remaining on a $90,000 annual salary, and Clark County Recorder Frances Deane was asked to step down from office today after search warrants at her office and home led Metro to confiscate her computer and boxes of documents, with the charge: “misappropriation of public property.”
Deane faces 19 felonies of misconduct under allegations of selling copies of county documents to businesses for thousands of dollars, as well as not reporting campaign contributions. She is suspected of profiting more than $250,000.
Deane recorded over 5,000 documents per day from marriage certificates to property records, all public information on file at the Clark County Recorder’s office. She’s accused of selling information within those hundreds of millions of pages of records, which are normally available free to the public.
Two years ago, Deane had done the same thing, when she started a private company for individuals to view public documents from her office for a cost. She was then charged and paid a $5,000 fine. She kept her job.
Deane stated last week, “I did not do this crime” and maintained her innocence.
Today, District Judge Douglas Herndon felt evidence was sufficient enough to order her removed from office as of Friday, Sept. 8.
| Permalink | Comments (0)
SEX EDUCATION…LAS VEGAS STYLE
Sex Education…Las Vegas Style
Naked nymphs, erotic exhibitionists, strippers, and lap dancers exposed their talents to an appreciative Las Vegas audience last week to raise $2500 for the financially strapped Clark County School District. The money will be donated to provide computers and supplies for teachers.
The performers fulfilled fantasies dressed as tantalizing teachers, sexy schoolgirls, and lonely librarians. “We bump ‘n grind so no kid will be left behind,” explained one well endowed dancer. “We do it for education”, added a topless woman hanging upside down from a brass pole.
Leave it to Las Vegas to discover a way to beat the high cost of education and reduce the burden on tax payers. What’s the secret? Sex, something the city has in abundance.
Sex has helped Las Vegas become one of the world’s most successful cities. So why not put it to work for our schools?
Using sex to finance schools, Las Vegas could have the best, most well equipped, and desirable school system in the country!
Now, when the high school wants to send the band to the Rose Parade they won’t have any problem raising the money-just hold a naked car wash. Wouldn’t you pay $100 to have your Hummer done?
A raffle for an all expense-paid weekend at the Pussy Galore Chicken Ranch could buy helmets and uniforms for the whole football team. The consolation prize might be a free subscription to Hustler Magazine.
Cost of the Senior Prom can easily be covered by uncovering the Royal Court. The Queen’s crown would be placed on the head of the most exciting striptease. The evening will end with the graduating class doing the latest dance craze called “The Kama Sutra”.
Yearbook sales would set new records if full-spread pin-ups of cheerleaders laced the pages. Every girl would dream of being the class centerfold.
The lack of parent participation in school affaires could easily be solved. Just begin all PTA meetings with a porno film. Here again is yet another opportunity to raise funds by charging a modest admission fee.
School administrators must, of course, still provide equal opportunities for minority students. The Gay and Lesbian Club would be permitted to conduct gender specific activities like Boy Circle-Jerks and Bitch Bashes. Trans-sexual and cross-dressers can go both ways.
Using sex to finance public education may at first seem questionable. However, consider this-it’s plentiful and readily available. Everybody likes it… one way or the other. Sex sells; and, it’s an unlimited resource!
Education supported by sex would increase local business participation. Adult video stores, massage parlors and escort services, traditionally shunned by public schools, would now be able to offer scholarships and grants to promising young students.
Students with exceptional ability could major in sex management. They would learn the in’s and out’s of the business. Graduates would learn how to make sex work for their community. Males would receive a Master’s Diploma; females would get a T ‘n A Degree.
If sex paid for the cost of your childs education, wouldnt you be willing to get in the act? Take a position! Demonstrate your support for Sex Education by attending a school board meeting and demanding satisfaction. Clearly, sex and school belong in bed together!
With sex as legal tender, The Strip could finance operation of the UNLV and Downtown could easily float the junior college. Of course, students would also earn their tuition and books working in the local sex industry. In Las Vegas, every child gets an education!
There are worse ways to pay for education – taxes, state lotteries, government investments. None of these are as reliable as sex. What’s more, sex is clean, healthy, doesn’t pollute the environment or cause global warming. Al Gore should be able to get behind this.